Tricycle

Release date: 19/08/1996 | Length: 1:59 | Release: E-Bow the Letter | SuE#277

Another whimsical R.E.M. instrumental for the history books. That this quirky number was the b-side to the gloomy E-Bow the Letter says something about R.E.M.’s ability for subversiveness, or their inclination to toss off b-sides like yesterday’s news. Peter Buck’s surf rock jangling is cheerful and complemented by a fun organ riff (but not a fruity organ, that’s a different thing altogether). After a minute, the melody repeats and threatens to sound like the backing track to a mid-00s flash game that jarringly loops for all eternity. But it does end, and we’re all the better for it. Objectively uplifting, but far too goofy to be a genuine dopamine hit.

Burning Hell

Release date: 10/06/1985 | Length: 3:49 | Release: Cant Get There from Here | SuE#170

Women got legs, men got pants

R.E.M. are a rock band, though over the course of 15 albums they’ve been a pop band, a folk band, a glam band, as well as dabbling in other styles to complement their sound. One thing they’ve never credibly been is a metal band. Burning Hell gives a good indication of what they could do did the urge ever compel them.

It’s a clear parody of the hair metal sound that obliterated speakers in the 1980s, complete with sleazy lyrics and a huge snare hit. “Women got legs”. Yeah they do Michael. “Men got pants”. Umm, yeah we do Michael. “I got the picnic if you got the ants”. I’m not sure quite what you mean Michael but yeah right on.

This leather-emblazoned style is notorious for its depiction of women in their lyrics, be it glamourising barely-legal teenagers (“When I see you coming out of school that day, I knew I’ve got to have you”, Kiss, Christine Sixteen) or simply women as a sexual form (“I just need a new toy, I tell you what girl, Dance for me, I’ll keep you over-employed”, Mötley Crüe, Girls, Girls, Girls). A devil’s advocate would argue that these songs are simply that, art forms from which one must take a detached and neutral view towards, but the lack of nuance to metal’s nadir begs to differ.

Stipe’s snarl is an exaggeration of what he sounded like on Fables of the Reconstruction, though whilst Burning Hell was an outtake and tacked onto the 12″ of Cant Get There from Here, the song had been doing the rounds since their debut album. At live shows, Mike Mills’ bass is more prominent, and it’s Peter Buck’s scattergun riffs that occupy the centre on the studio take.

I imagine Burning Hell would’ve been a bit of a hoot live, but it’s no surprise that this wasn’t a particularly enduring b-side and was played no later than 1986. Essential R.E.M. this is not.

Rotary Ten

Release date: 14/07/1986 | Length: 1:58 | Release: Fall on Me | SuE#214

As I will come to later, Fall on Me is R.E.M. fans’ favourite song [citation delivered]. Is it because of Rotary Ten, the b-side? No, no it is not, otherwise Rotary Ten would be R.E.M. fans’ favourite song, and Fall on Me would be languishing at #214.

However Rotary Ten is still a little fun. The instrumental bounces around Mike Mills’ heavy bass plucking and Peter Buck jangles out some dud notes. Buck described this song as being “a movie theme without a movie”, and it would kind of fit a comedy gangster film, from the early half of the 20th century. The ramshackle jazz and blues number was almost certainly devised in a warm-up jam, and was not written expecting anyone to ever write a hundred words about it. Sigh.

Organ Song

Release date: 05/02/93 | Length: 3:25 | Release: The Sidewinder Sleeps Toniter-1096722-1511644853-1564.jpeg | SuE#267

Over the course of their 31 year career, R.E.M. recorded roughly 310 songs. That works out as ten songs a year, which at a very simplistic level could equate to 31 ten-track albums. Obviously this isn’t the case, as there’s b-sides, bonus tracks, covers, and all kinds of gubbins making up that number, but even still it’s a damn impressive amount.

This however means that there will be recordings like this, a b-side to Automatic for the People‘s 3rd single The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite. To return to the maths briefly, this album spawned six singles, and based on a rough approximation of three b-sides per single (added on top of the 12 tracks already on the album), this means that the band recorded 30 tracks in this short period. Therefore, I think it’s fair to let them off for including a rather dormant instrumental song, under the elementary name of Organ Song. 

It is the sound of an organ playing, no more, no less. I said I’d write about every R.E.M. recording, and that includes stuff like this. It’s actually objectively nice, as if it’s the soundtrack to walking through a cathedral. However, there is nothing incisive to say about this. There are numerous other songs like this tacked on to the singles of this era, so prepare for more insightful excerpts like this, such as the delectably-titled Fruity Organ, the side-dish to Man on the Moon.